“Fight against cancer”

Even before I found out I had cancer I was always confused by hearing that people were “fighting” their cancer. To me it really just seemed to come down to whatever the docs were doing to the patient that was actually doing the real fighting. I also felt like if someone was observed as fighting against cancer, and ended up dying there was this idea that they somehow didn’t fight hard enough. And what about the people that might have had it so bad that they just didn’t feel like it was worth it to “fight” against what might have seemed like the inevitable? Were those people looked down on by their family, friends, and other people who were fighting cancer? So I guess I never really liked the idea that someone was fighting the cancer directly.

Once I found out that I had cancer, I felt like I could choose two paths. One that threw my hands up in the air, got severely depressed, and gave up with life, and the other where I tried to max out each day I had left to live. I think the fighting that cancer patients like myself are really doing are fighting against the depression, pessimism, hopelessness, and various other downers that can be caused by cancer. I’d like to think that cancer patients who are fighting against the negative emotions do help increase their odds for a longer life. But for those who have so much pain, or so little hope I don’t think that makes them any less a fighter than anyone else. They are just as in need and worthy of family and friend support as a patient who is more vocal about fighting against their cancer.

6 Comments

  1. As the one facing a life threatening medical crisis, you are the fighter. A full fledged war continues to rain down upon your existence. As if diagnosis and prognosis are not enough to engage, the campaign of assault commences. The deep and private worry about your loved ones; traversing the mine field of insurance benefits and co-pays; getting (demanding) what is needed; finding courage, again and again to keep moving forward to face the unknown. Mental warfare wages as you try to keep it at bay.
    The physical assault begins as treatment can become worse than the cancer. Inexhaustible levels of discomfort and suffering plague body functions, one discomfort rolling into another and always grabbing to take your spirit into darkness and dipair.
    You are the fighter! You fight against the less understood ravages of cancer; huge and rapid shifts in financial stability, career, relationships, independence, outlook and the simply pleasures and comfort.

    We, doctors, nurses, wife, sisters, brothers, mothers, fathers, aunts, uncles, cousins, friends…are your helpers.

    We are your strength when you need it. We are your soft place to fall. We are you encouragers. We freely and lovingly accompany you. We hold you in our hearts. What ever you need we are here for you. We are your helpers. We will be with you every step of the way in the capacity that we are able.

    The way you fight is personal and unique as you are. You choices are yours.

    • P2

      We love you whole heartedly and respect you deeply. You are an amazing, creative, insightful, generous and extraordinarily outstanding person.
      Your beauty shines through!

  2. Mom

    You wrote so well about being a “fighter”. I agree with everything you wrote. I really enjoy reading your thoughts. Wish you could write more. Love you so much. Mom

  3. Jessi

    I could not have said it better. I just learned about your blog and so have read it all now. You are an amazing person, have been since you came into this world. Always have had a soft but strong spirit. I practically grew up at your house from childhood on. I have a scar on my hand, barely noticable now, but it came when we were told NOT to open a can, and what did we do, we opened it and so on. But we had fun. In ever pic from the time we could hardly sit up to the party’s your parents threw, and till Jodi I was the only girl!!! lol But good times, and hope to make more. No matter what you are “fighting” be it Cancer, or another illness people don’t know it is hard work, each day is a fight, but each day is also a gift, and you inspire me to remember to keep positive and find a reason to keep going no matter what the future holds. You have cancer yes, but you are still the same Loren I grew up with and we are getting old, and I want to never let that friendship we created so early in life, just babies on the couch, we look so silly, then our parents taking pictures holding us upside down, then we must have gotten tired, even at 5 or 6 months old taking a nap in the crib. You are the ONLY true party, like one a bunch of college kids throw with a big old bon fire, drinks, and yes fun. Mom knew I’d be safe between You and Carson watching over me. lol We had fun. And how we wished we could have been at your wedding, we have to find time to meet up with you guys and give you your wedding gift!!!! I think it might mean more now than ever, you’ll understand when you get it.

    Thanks for being such a amazing example of being positive no matter what. That is a true gift.
    Love you very much,
    Jessi

  4. Jessi

    Sorry I went comment crazy, just learned of your blog and so wanted to let you know we love you with all our hearts. You are a brave soul and don’t feel you have to reply to all my posts, just saying you inspire me, and you honestly have lifted my spirits with your point of views, honesty, and being open about such a difficult time. But you are tough, and I wish I could be as tough as you, and if I start to get down I will think of you. We would love to see you soon. We could rest our eyes and not feel rude, lol, my Gran was always saying “I’m just resting my eyes”. Never heard anyone but her and then me, put it like that. Mom hates it when she thinks I’m asleep, and guess what I’m not, just resting my eyes. Just like I always say I have “Chipmunk Cheeks” and another person with what I have said “Hello Fellow Chipmunk Friend” and it really helped. Life is too short to take everything so seriously. But what I do take seriously is those who we consider family, and your whole family is our family, so know you are close to our hearts as well as Alex. Many couples not facing anything serious can’t say what you do about one another. So that speaks volumes. You just keep on, keeping on, and keep in touch.
    Love and Prayers,
    June, Jessi, and Mattie

  5. Robin

    Loren you are such an inspiration to everyone! Keep it up! I so believe in the power of the spirit and mind. I grew up with epilepsy and always fault to show everyone that I was normal as everyone else was. That helped to make me a strong and positive willed person!! I got to where I could stop a seizure from occurring with imagining beautiful pastel rainbows and I also outgrew the epilepsy so there is more proof of what positive thoughts can bring. Do not stop it does work and I have seen and totally believe in miracles! I know one is coming your way! You are surrounded by positive aura from family and friends so if you get a little tired and need to check your eyelids for holes we are all there to step in to keep it rolling for you and for Alex!! Now for the important stuff. I have really enjoyed your music even though they call me the redneck hippy 🙂 Keep it going Sir Zelda Godzilla Mozart

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *